Follow my dear mate Brent's very natural recipes!!
The thought has crossed my mind several times - "What do I make the family for dessert?" Something light, something creamy, something the family will pat me on the back over and give kisses on the cheek. Well, not necessarily. There's the sane recipes for the "good" family members, and then there's the tampered with fun recipes for them hard-to-pleasers you see only once or twice a year.
Lets just call this "L&N's devilish Holiday recipes for the entire family"...
Chocolate Tofu Pudding:
1 lb. silken tofu
2 tbsp cocoa/carob
1/4 tsp of salt
1/3 - 1/2 cup maple syrup (or preferred sweetner)
1 tsp vanilla extract
Blend until smooth. Spoon into small bowls and chill.
* Having trouble shutting up your talkative Grandparents? Replace the tofu with glue. Can't seem to get that conversation goin' with the quiet relative? Add desired amount of hard liquor. (Note: Added ingredients are sure to see results in some way, shape, or form.)
Squash or sweet potato cake:
1 cup ww pastry flour
1 cup brown rice flour (for a less dense result, add another cup of pastry flour in place of the rice flour)
1/2 tsp sea salt
1 tsp each of coriander, cinnamon, and ginger
1 cup apple juice, grain coffee, or water
1/4 cup chopped nuts (optional)
3 cups cooked squash or sweet potatoes
1/2 cup maple syrup (or preferred sweetner)
Preheat oven to 350F
Mix dry ingredients
Add remaining ingredients
Pour into oil cake pan
Bake 1 hour
* For an explosive gathering, replace 1-2 cups of the flour with gun powder. If your just looking for a good laugh over the family's expression at the dinner table, then replace the rice flour with the hard-to-bake and unwelcome taste of rye flour. Still holding a grudge after all these years? Then another option is to replace the salt with black pepper. Shake until your sinister urges subside. For an even more potent recipe, replace the cup of apple juice with blasting jelly. Ooops, the Army experience is getting the best of me. (Caution: You may have to turn the oven down due to the gun powder and/or blasting jelly. This may take some time to bake and can complicate the cooking process with a big *bang* if your not careful.)
The family gathering experience is a time of love and laughter, and I hope these simple recipes can bring out the best in both of those qualities.
This has been a paid for moment by Lucifer & Nefarious, Inc..
admit it, Brent's deadly funny ;)